To the girls who sent me heartbreak emails

I often get long emails, messages about heartbreak.

My friend was like "so you're like a guru now?"

Lol, you bet... nah, just joking.

I'm no guru, I wonder why girls always ask me for help, I can't even get my shit together.

Honestly, I can't heal your broken heart.

Nobody can heal your broken heart.

Whatever advice it is, it is useless because your heart won't listen.

Cry.

Cry all you want.

One day, you'll notice that your tears have "dried" out.

You no longer cry even when you're still sad about a break up.
That's when you start moving on with your life.
You might not notice it because you're still sad but you're progressing, you just don't know it.

The only solution is 

 The key is 

Accept that you're not marrying this man.

Accept that he's going to have the "next" girl, or the "next" girls.
Accept that you are just not "the girl".

Accept that he no longer loves you.

Accept that nobody can't live without someone.

Sometimes you feel...

Yes, hun, you're only worth that much to certain people.

It doesn't mean you're worthless or you're only worth that much.

You are worth what you think you worth.

I don't know if certain people take you for granted, or he's just not the one for you.
People often say that a person treats you right if he's the RIGHT one.

I don't know right or wrong, left and right.
What I know is that it's just life, you know?

In life, I try very hard to not take anyone for granted, still trying.

Talk about parents first.

We always take our parents for granted.

We don't have a helper at home now, those who have a helper at home...

Please kneel and thank your parents for your good life that they've given you, lol.

My mum used to do all the housework, for herself, for my sisters.
I had a helper while living away from my mother, then I learnt to do laundry studying in Aussie.

 In recent years, I started doing laundry on my own.

Lucky enough, we have a dryer at home.

Laundry to me, it's troublesome but it's a lot easier, at least I don't have to hang the clothes out.

Home dryer broke down last week.

It's like hell to me, having to hang my clothes out again.

My mum did laundry for our family of five for 20-30years.

It's easy to talk about it, how good my mum is, how much she did for us.
I want to appreciate her more, I want to show her appreciation.

It's sometimes hard to apply in real life.
It's easier to be said than done.

Appreciation, not everyone knows how.

I always say that I'm still learning to appreciate, always learning.

You learn to appreciate everyday.

You don't just know how to appreciate.

You don't.

Actions prove everything.

You can always say that you appreciate your boyfriend, your girlfriend.

Do you actually do things to show appreciation?

Little things in life show your appreciation.

Appreciation is never enough.
Remember, appreciating is done on your own will.
Do not expect people to appreciate you just because you appreciate them.
I always expect people to appreciate me because I appreciate them.
It just doesn't work that way.

I don't say good morning to my mum every time but when I see her I will greet her "mum".

When I see my dad, I greet "dad", that's just normal form of showing respect, of course.

I appreciate my parents' existence, they are the reason to/for/of my existence.

My nephew hugs me good night whenever I'm at home before he goes to sleep, it's really sweet.

He knocks on my door sometimes, he says in his baby voice

"Yiyi (aunty), please open the door, I want to hug you good night."

Super cute, should catch it on camera next time.

I love it when people greet me good morning, wish me good night.

Small gesture like this is a form of appreciation too.

I don't know if it makes sense but it does to me.

A story for you.

I started my car engine, sat in the car outside of my house.

I was sad, so I cried in the car.

It started raining.

I didn't notice my mum coming out of the house to
take in two pieces of my nephew's clothes hung outside.

I bet she saw me wiping my tears off, I hurriedly drove away.

That was the worst feeling in the world.
She didn't have to see me cry?

They are more hurt seeing you hurting like this.

Most of the time, you'll feel worthless, you'll feel like a failure,

you'll feel like you've disappointed your parents, disappointed the whole world.
Why can't I get over? Why can't I get over?

The road to "recovery" is tough, it will be tough.

Don't be too hard on yourself, (moderate hardness is sufficient), lol.

So many grandmother stories to tell.

You are on your own, nobody can help you.
Even when I'm saying this, advising you, convincing, I, myself, might not know any better.
Again, it's easier to be said than done but you just have to do it.

Be sad, cry all you want but stop when you know enough is enough.

You will know it because time will tell you when it's enough.

Stay tough through this process and when you think you can't take it, think about your parents.

Be mindful of what you allow.
She is, he is, they are, we are what you allow.
If you allow someone to treat you in a certain manner, that someone treats you in that manner.
It's what you allow.
So be careful of what you allow.
You allow someone to treat you like dirt, someone will treat you like dirt.
That's called taking things for granted.
Not everyone knows how to appreciate.

So happen that today is some sorta international women's day.

I'm not all about feminism, I don't need a man in my life but I do want the man I love, lol.

 Be a child to your parents.

Be a lady to your man.

Be an employee to your employer.

I don't write a good post but this is pretty much what I want to say to every girl who sent me emails.
You can still send me emails, say whatever you want to say.
It might make you feel better telling someone.
I don't know you, you don't know me but I feel you.

I know this song through Jay Chou long long long long time ago.
He wrote the melody for NanQuan Mama.
The lyric is simple yet beautiful, written by one of the group members of NanQuan Mama.
說著笑著的午后 鐘聲一直在停留
風聲靜靜躺著在誘惑
我一個人在角落 沒有妳陪伴的我
連寂寞都笑我太墮落
廣場旁邊的煙囪 煙霧瀰漫妳面容
我悄悄背頌妳的溫柔
喝著加溫後的啤酒 這樣唯美的鏡頭
是否只存在故事之中
在妳的身後 時間把過去都帶走
時間把鏡頭帶走不假思索 回憶不放手
好想再跟妳牽著手 牽著妳給我的溫柔
哭過以後眼淚還是不停的流
在妳的身後 時間把畫面都帶走
時間把鏡頭帶走不假思索 回憶不放手
好想再跟妳牽著手 牽著曾有過的溫柔
哭過之後眼淚還是不停的流
遇見彩虹 雨下過之後
街角出現彩虹 淚流乾之後 有彩虹


"在你的身後　時間把過去都帶走"

Time will heal you.
Let music help you too.